Saturday, August 28, 2010

Facebook Commentary: Nightmare on Elm Street 2 Freddy's Revenge

This was my commentary for what some call the Gayest Horror Film of All Time, Nightmare on Elm Street 2. I did it on Facebook as Status updates and my pal, the World Champion Pete LIKE a lot of it. But I'm guessing most people are out doing more important things today to follow. Oh well, its still amusing...

Carl Towns A little math: 1 clueless producer with a struggling studio + 1 clueless director + 1 script with gay subtext + 1 gay actor + 1 gay set designer + 1 film icon=???

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Carl Towns A Nightmare on Elm Street 2: Freddy's Revenge!!! Facebook Commentary is about to get a different kind of sexy... a disturbing kind...

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Carl Towns Filmed the year after the original but set 5 years in the future so in their time its 1988. That means Ninja Turtles and Jem baby! She's so outrageous!

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Carl Towns Bus scene opens it. Music by Christopher Young whose done many horror film soundtracks, including Spider-Man 3. That was a scary bad movie. Except when Peter was being a jerk. I found that pimp.

For you black folks, like me, he did Tales from the Hood too...

Carl Towns Freddy's driving the bus into the desert with our scared lead(Mark Patton as Jesse Walsh) and a couple other victims. Incidentally, Patton knew this film was quite gay. But never brought it up... I guess.

Carl Towns Our male lead is crying like a little bitch. And it's Freddy! Maybe its Englund... Englund was hired on later because Shaye didn't want to give him the pay bump.

Carl Towns Jesse wakes up screaming. His sister asks "Why can't Jesse wake up like everybody else?"

Carl Towns Veteran actors Clu Galager and Hope Lange as the parents. the last time veteran actors were hired for Nightmare films, incidentally.

Carl Towns Ron Grady got a ride to the audition by his pal Robert Downy Jr. He should've told Robert to keep driving because this film is crap.

Ooh Ooh man ass. Its already getting a little uncomfortable.

"Assume the position"-Coach.

Carl Towns The coach hangs at S&M clubs an likes pretty boys... Yeah, I'd be quitting PE.

Carl Towns IMDB fact: This is the only film in the series not to use Charles Bernstein's original theme, or a variation of it.

Carl Towns Grady tells Walsh about the house. Its the same one from the good, original version.

Few minutes later Freddy says he needs Jesse. you know... for special work.

"You got the body... I've got the brains..."-Freddy

"Lets make some money!"-Pet Shop Boys

Carl Towns Oh no... the dance scene. With Jesse. This is wrong on so many levels. gay people think this is gay. No seirously, it's.. it's... it's bad... it's very, very bad. But the female love interest who walks in it, is cute. The Kim Myers character probably would've ran away in real life if she had saw that dance.

Carl Towns Mark Patton was actually on 21 Jump Street once. Sadly IMBD doesn't have that listed so either Wiki is wrong or IMDB. I need to know if he shared the screen with Johnny Depp! Because Depp was in the original Nightmare flick.

Carl Towns Back to Robert Rusler, he's actually been in a few things. No real big parts but has worked on hit shows, with big actors, and even a top director or two.

BTW, I should've said Rusler got a ride with Downy. Grady's his character.

Carl Towns Revealing mistakes: When the kids are reading the diary about Freddy Krueger, the pages that they are "reading" from are all blank.

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Carl Towns Huh... Marshall Bell, the gay coach, did a few good films and was even in Capote, which won Philip Seymor Hoffman his Oscar. Capote was gay too. Just striking the similarities here on this commentary.

Carl Towns The S&M club scene. Soon new Line founder and film producer Robert Shaye will make his cameo. In the gay leather his too-young-to-enter-the-shop daughters helped him pick out, apparently.

Check out the Never Sleep Again documentary.

Carl Towns Found by the coach, brought to school to run laps in the gym, Jesse takes a shower. The coach is about to get hit by flying balls. I mean, sports balls. Than tied up in the shower, stripped and spanked by a towel. I mean whipped by a towel. Oooh... Freddy played by a stunt man than kills him. In front of a naked Jesse....

WAIT! Jesse has the glove. Freddy's making him kill for him.

Carl Towns

Carl Towns Click the photo if you're brave. Don't worry, its work safe. Just look at the pic, and imagine the scenario in the movie. Yeah...

Carl Towns One more...

Carl Towns IMDB Trivia: The running time for this film is 87 minutes, Freddy appears in just 13 of them.

Carl Towns Found this about the film: The verdict is in, ladies and gents, and the ruling is thus: "Freddy's Revenge" is the gayest horror film ever made. Fuck David Decoteau and his shirtless sissyboy WB shlockfests. Fuck "The Hunger" and its hot girl-on-vampire action. Hell -- fuck "Rocky Horror"...,

for that matter -- none of these can hold a candle to the full-immersion

queerness that is ANOES2.

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Carl Towns ‎"We made Nightmare 2 absolutely clueless that it had any gay overtones whatsoever," says Director Jack Sholder. "But looking back, it was so gay, it was amazing! All I can say is we were all incredibly naive, or all incredibly latently gay."

Carl Towns IMDB Trivia: Brad Pitt, John Stamos and Christian Slater all auditioned for the role of Jesse.

Carl Towns

Kerry: So you goin' to Lisa's house tomorrow night?

Ron Grady: Nope. Can't. I'm grounded.

Kerry: Home come?

Ron Grady: I threw my grandmother down a flight of stairs.

Yea, that would get you grounded.

Carl Towns The pool party scene is about to start. Awkward sex scene coming up. Yes, good times abound.

-Pedro Sambrano likes this.

Carl Towns Oh, not a sex scene. Was getting hot and heavy and a... a... tongue transformation of sorts makes Jesse run leaving for help. His friend Grady. Jesse breaks into his home. Grady btw, is almost naked.

Carl Towns Jesse Walsh: Something is trying to get inside my body.

Ron Grady: Yeah, and she's female, and she's waiting for you in the cabana. And *you* wanna sleep with me.

Carl Towns Our boy is about to have a coming out. Not Jesse coming out of the closet but Freddy Krueger coming out of Jesse. is this symbolic, or metaphoric? I just don't know.

But the special effects here are the best in the entire film. I mean, really, he just comes bursting out. It's like BAM! There's a Freddy inside you!

Carl Towns Freddy's not inside him, he is Freddy. Wait... So Freddy is still inside him. Eww...

Carl Towns ‎"He's inside and he wants to take me again"-Jesse on Freddy

Carl Towns Freddy is about to make his debut at the pool party. Now thats how you kill a party. Inviting the knived gloved child molesting/killing bastard.

"You are all my children now."

Carl Towns Errors in geography: The fictional location for the Nightmare on Elm Street franchises was Springwood, Ohio. Throughout the film Palm Trees are visible in the background which cannot be grown in Ohio climate and the bus in the opening scene drives through the desert,

which is not part of Ohio's geography.

Carl Towns Continuity: When Freddy attacks the kids at Lisa's pool party, he kills the first kid by slashing him diagonally across the right side of his face and neck. When the kid drops to the floor, the wounds are vertical and on the left side of his face.

Carl Towns The Rotten Tomatos score, 45%. One critic: Very weird, homoerotic flick, but very entertaining in a 80s kind of way.

Carl Towns The remake/reboot got 15%. But there's more reviews in regard to that film so maybe that's why its liked less.

Carl Towns ‎"I’m shocked you never noticed. Gay people noticed on opening weekend back in the 80′s. Its legendary."-Comment on a website talking about this.

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Carl Towns Coming up on the final scenes when our hero, Lisa Webber faces off against Jesse/Freddy. That's right, the man is the damsel in distress and the chick is the dashing hero. This film was indeed ahead of its time.

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Carl Towns Jesse's fighting Freddy. Or is this some sort of Christian propaganda in regards to fighting the gay inside of you? Because in a moment Lisa is going to kiss him, you know, like Sleeping Beauty.

Carl Towns

Carl Towns The finale is coming up and everything is going fine right? Pfff... Freddy kills Lisa's friend, drive off into the desert. Wonderful...

Carl Towns

Carl Towns I saw this film back when I was young and mostly just the end. I didn't see the full film for years. I did hear about the gay subtext. In fact, before I bought the DVDs I tried watching it on TV until I noticed that Nightmare 3 was on a different channel. But even though I switched to a better sequel, I did notice that Nightmare 2 was odd. I hated it the first few times I saw it. But its kind of growing on me now.

Carl Towns Which scares me.

That's it. Whats up for next time? I'm thinking foreign film, bad dramatic movie, or some sort of sci fi/fanatsy flick. I'll let you know unless you have something for me.

Preferably on DVD. No VHS in this room... so I can't do Double Dragon. Just watch it for yourself and do what Pete does, say "the Shadow Falls" every... fifteen minutes. It increases the enjoyment of the film. Well, if you're cool like us.

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